PROFILES: Sheryl K

I've never been a fan of Frappuccinos lately but on that sunny morning, I was just a couple of sips away from finishing my cup. That is also when we decided that it's time for our interview. At 39, Sheryl K is a Professor at De La Salle University - Dasmariñas, my Alma Mater. I was blessed to have been one of her students during my college years and when I was teaching, she was not just a colleague but became one of my closest friends.

Prior to the interview proper, we were already indomitably speaking for two hours for we had so much to catch up. For five years, we taught students together and spent almost everyday at the same faculty room. That is when I have known her, when I really have known who Sheryl was. Strong, warm, and yes - inspiring. Sheryl was the only name in my mind when I decided that my next interview will be with a Teacher.

Steve: Good Morning Maam Sheryl! And thank you so much for accepting my invite to be my next guest.

Sheryl K: Yes!

Steve: Maam She, let's say you are speaking in front of an audience, How will you introduce Sheryl K?

Sheryl K: I have to say, I'll introduce myself as Sheryl, the professor, the teacher in DLSU-D. I've been teaching for 15 years and I can say that I'm happy and fulfilled as a person and it's what keeps me going with my life.

Looking Back

Steve: Wow 15 years!  So, let's turn the hands of time, tell us who Sheryl was during her early years.

Sheryl K: Early years as a teacher?

Steve: As a person.

Sheryl K: As a person, I remember myself as someone who's really determined. When you come from a background where things are not handed to you, you have to strive very hard and that's the time when I realize that education is the most important thing for me to overcome poverty. And for me to be able to do things for my family. I am where I am right now because of that dream.

From L-R: Clara (Mother), Alejandro (Father), Sheryl, Alex (Brother)

Steve: Was there any situation wherein you almost gave up on that dream?

Sheryl K: Actually, on a dream of having a degree, No. When I graduated highschool and I wasn't still sure if I will go to college, I had this determination to tell my Nanay [mother], I should go to college. I should study. Or else nothing will happen. It's my faith in the Lord that tells me to say those things and I was never wrong with that.

Steve: You have always been one of my heroes. Being the breadwinner to the family, you still maintained that effervescent positivity in life. Knowing that you have siblings, do you think that being the breadwinner was a matter of choice to you?

Sheryl K: I suppose Yes. That's when I realize that when you pray and you are specific, God will give you the specifics too. Because when I prayed to be able to graduate and earn a degree, I told God that I'd provide for my family. Perhaps this is it, this is the time and fulfilment of what I have prayed for. So you have to be careful for what you pray for. Being the breadwinner to the family is something that that keeps me going. It's part of my mission in life so I suppose I don't regret it.

"The attitude of being grateful for everything
that you are blessed with, that's one
source of happiness." -Sheryl K

When you come to a point in life where you get to accept the situation you are in and you are thankful for it, because I wouldn't be able to be where I'm in without the help of my parents. The attitude of being grateful [to your parents], I suppose you are the person that you are because of them. I wouldn't live my life any differently.

Life as a Teacher

Steve: After we talk about your past and how you've been through life, let's talk about your profession. What is something different about being a teacher from other professions, in terms of character?

Sheryl K: For me, I'm just being myself. People get to see me for who I am. Perhaps my students also accept me for who I am. My relationship with them is something that is so important that I don't have to pretend, to have to be someone else. That's why I don't have any difficulty relating to them. Teaching is really a noble job and I just have to be who I am. I just have to teach the way I believe I can influence my students and at the same time nurture them for being who they are.

Steve: How do you feel about living by the norms of what a teacher should be in this judgemental society? Do you think it's fair?

Sheryl K: Regarding people?

Sheryl Delima K

Steve: Regarding to the society that we have right now, where in you have to encompass certain characters to be something like a role model? Someone who is almost perfect?

Sheryl K: When you relate to your students, they can see who you are. You can't hide, especially students nowadays, you can't fake them. They will know who you are, what type of person you are, based on your relationship with them.I'm not perfect but I suppose there's something in me that they see that I'm true and that I'm genuine. It is how I relate to them with my faith and belief [in God], that they see me as someone who is not a role model by being perfect, but a person they can imitate.

Someone who they can look up to, with the positive influences that I can give them. Because I can be a friend, I can listen to their problems, I can help them if I have a way to do so. I see my students as persons too. But more importantly, they are my students because I have to impart knowledge to them. But more than that, it's building a relationship with your students that makes them trust you and not judge you.

"Most students will forget their teacher, but they will never
forget the teacher that influenced them positively"
-Sheryl K

Steve: I can attest to that because I have been your student. But to be honest, everything you said is actually evident and I can prove that. But how about for other teachers? Do you think it's fair that every teacher should watch themselves, their reputation with their students? Do we have an obligation to be almost perfect and be someone who should be imitated?

Sheryl K: Yes, it's a big responsibility to be a teacher.. When you become a teacher, people look up to you, your students will look up to you. You are not perfect but your goal is to at least do things that will influence your students to do good.

As a teacher, attitude can influence your students. Even if you're not perfect, [but] you are trying at least to be perfect for your students, it's one way of getting the job done. Most students will forget their teacher, but they will never forget the teacher that influenced them positively. It's not always about the acknowledgement and recognition, it's being remembered that I have done or said something positive to them that they may always remember me by, that's already a mission accomplished for me.

Steve: Nowadays, do you think teachers of today are still respected by society? Why or why not?

Sheryl K: There's this connotation that teachers are teachers because they can't go anywhere[in life, farther].

Steve: Oh Yes! I've heard that one.

Maam Sheryl and me during the 2014 Graduation Rites at DLSU-Dasmariñas

Sheryl K: Yes. Society can be judging, but at the same time they can also be, [the term is] not forgiving eh, but very considerate. When people say that there will be no engineers, no lawyers, no doctors without teachers, that lifts the spirits of teachers up.

All professions must be respected, but I suppose it's how you separate teachers from other profession that makes you want to appreciate it more. At times, it's sad to hear these stories that teachers are regarded less, but at the end of the day, as a teacher, it is your own fulfillment that defines you. If teachers are not respected by the society, but as a teacher, you do everything in your power to be respected by your students or your friends or anyone who is in your circle, that's what's most important.

Steve: Was there a time that you had a difficult student? I'm sure! In my 5 years, I had a few, and you have been teaching for 15. Tell me about how you handled that situation.

Sheryl K: Honestly, in my first years of teaching, I was very strict. These difficult students always give me a hard time-always absent, not submitting requirements, before i was really very furious. I was still in my 20s when I started teaching, I would retaliate. I would lose my patience. As you mature, you'll see that these students, these difficult students are those that have problems. Therefore it is better to understand and know where they're coming from instead of getting angry.

Steve: So it's not a matter of how the students are changing, it's a matter of how you change as a teacher.

Sheryl K: Yes. Now, I try to see where the problem starts and try to understand my students. And if there's something that I can do, even if I have to get out of my way, I'd do it. Because there's always a reason why they are difficult, why they are doing these things to themselves, why they are the way they are. It's really a different phase, because before I just burst out in anger, even tried to get back at them. But now, it's a different story.

Love and Friendship

Steve: Tell us about this unwritten chapter, your Love Life? Is it really unwritten? Can you share about it?

Sheryl K: I think it is really unwritten.

*both chuckles and laughs*

Because I'm in this point in my life where I am contemplating if I will still be able to get married or not. But when I talk to my best friend, what's nice about where we are in life right now is maybe because we are still needed by our parents that's why we are not yet married. It's a mission that we have to accomplish for our parents and not for ourselves. It's really good when I talk to your Ate Yen [Sheryl's Best Friend] about these things. But the good thing is we are still open to it, we're not giving up, yet. I suppose when you mature, the most painful heartbreak that you had is just something to laugh about now.

From L-R: Sheryl, Memey, Yen, Lhot

We've had our share of ups and downs when it comes to love life. We've met people we never thought we'd meet if not in that area. These people have helped us and shaped us to the person that we are right now. With your Ate Yen, I'm very sure she wants to get married. With me, I am...also, but I'm on the verge of contemplating that 'Lord, if it's not for me, then, it is not for me' I believe that every people has a calling. I may not be in the vocation of being married, but I can still be a parent to my nephews, students, therefore, it is not necessary for me to be a real parent. But I'm not closing my doors.

Steve: That's the good thing.

Steve: How do you manage to become both single and a person who is happy and thankful. Because I can see it in you.

Sheryl K:I guess it's about being content with who you are and what you do. Knowing what could fulfill you. Being single has made me a stronger person, because I don't have to rely and do things on my own, I have to, I don't have a choice, but I'm happy. Being happy means realizing that you are where you should be, in a place where you are bound to. You don't need things, the affirmation of other people for you to be happy. The attitude of being grateful for everything that you are blessed with, that's one source of happiness. Therefore it's true! You can be happy and single at the same time.

Steve: You have been through a lot, I know that. I am very proud of what you have become today. Any words of encouragement to the Sheryl's today? people currently experiencing what you have experienced in life.

Sheryl K: My advise, perhaps, is what I did. Because the experiences that I had were rewarding. Just have that dream, that goal, it's really important. At times I get sad when I realize that my students don't have that goal anymore because everything is given and provided for them. It's having this goal and doing everything to achieve it, to make it happen. And at the same time, balance it with your faith in God, your belief that things will go your way if you just pray and believe in yourself. I just prayed, I dreamed of earning that degree - which I did, and at the same time, I have this faith in God and with my family that kept me together.

"To those people who have been blessed enough,
at least be grateful for it;and still have
that dream that will make you feel
accomplished and fulfilled." -Sheryl K

To those people who have been blessed enough, at least be grateful for it;and still have that dream that will make you feel accomplished and fulfilled. Have that sense of courage and determination that I had, things will go your way. It's not that easy but it will in time. There's no specific formula or element that you can use to get to where you want to go but you have to take people to journey with you. Put Emphasis in your character and how you deal and relate with other people. You can never say that you will not depend on people because  for sure you will need people to help you carry that burden, lift it up with you, and make your load lighter. Have that dream and be very specific on what those dreams are.

Maam Sheryl at the Grand Canyon, USA - 2016

Steve: Finish this Sentence. I'm happy right now, but I still want to...

Sheryl K: I'm happy right now, but I still want to have my own family.

***

PROFILES is a new segment on my blog which will be a one-on-one interview with an interesting personality, as I ask them to share a page of their life as they know it. I've always wanted to be a journalist so this is my way of feeding my hunger for that little taste of being a host. Through this blog, this world that I can call my own, this is my talk-show.

PROFILES: Caren V

Just a few weeks away from a grand milestone on her life, Caren V is excitedly waiting for that big day. At 20, graduating from University of Santo Tomas, she couldn't believe how fast time flew. A proud Filipina, a school achiever, a loving daughter, and a thoughtful sister - Caren is one of my favorite cousins that I was blessed with to look after, as she grew up from this cute little girl to the smart and beautiful lady that she is today.

It was 2 in the afternoon and just after I re-potted the cactus for her garden on that humid Monday afternoon, I was very excited to do my very first interview for this new segment on my blog. Caren is one of my favorite people in the whole world and to add to it, she even helped me setup the voice recorder app on my 5SE just minutes before we went live.  

***

Stevenson Que: Alright Caren, Let's start! Please let us know who you are briefly.

Caren V: I am Caren , currently a graduating student so we are just waiting for graduation day. I go to University of Santo Tomas and I am 20 years old.

College Life

Stevenson Que: Give us some of the details and key points from your college life, since you graduated from high school up until now.

Caren V: It was hard at first since everything was new, I had to adjust to a different lifestyle and take care of myself at the same time. However, through the years I was able to adjust and it became easier as time goes by.

Stevenson Que: How did you come up with the degree that you are going to finish very soon?

Caren V: It was not planned actually, and I was originally going for Architecture but I ended up in the College of Fine Arts and Design. So with that, I was planning to shift or transfer the following year. But by the end of the year I realize that art was just a hobby, so transferring to Architecture would basically be the same thing. And during college applications, I usually went for Architecture or Pre-Law, so I thought, why not try Political Science?

Then I was asking my Logic Professor that time in the College of Fine Arts about shifting processes, and she recommended me Legal Management if I want to pursue Law.

Stevenson Que: So this means you are going to be finishing a degree in..

Caren V: AB Legal Management

Caren V at UST's LM Week Business Plan Competition - Their team won as CHAMPIONS

Stevenson Que: Were there clubs or organizations that you were part of actively?

Caren V: There weren't much but I joined SCARLET and YFC or Youth of Christ, though I was not really active there.  I also joined SOCC or the Student Organization Coordinating Council and UST-LM Society (University of Santo Tomas Legal Management Society) were I became active in my latter years.

Looking Back

Stevenson Que: Through the last four years, what do you consider your greatest achievement on your college days?

Caren V: Probably in SOCC where I became a project head on a project called MAKIBATA. So it's where you foster kids from indigenous places for a few days and although I didn't get a chance to foster since I was staying on a dorm. It was very fulfilling to organize such activity and to see smiles on their faces, you'd really be filled with joy whenever they say "Salamat Ate" [Thank You Sister] to you with so much gratitude.

Stevenson Que: If you have something to tell UST, what will it be?

Caren V: It will probably be "Salamat" [Thank You] It was a great four years, and these four years brought me to people that I will forever treasure and of course the school brought me closer to God.

Caren V and her friend Laurmaine on their High School days (2013)

Stevenson Que: As we look back, What is your message to the Caren V 4 years ago?

Caren V: It will simply be, don't be afraid to make mistakes and have the courage to amend them.

Stevenson Que: How about to high school students nowadays about to enter college, what will be your advise to them?

Caren V: Just the same, parang it's okay to make mistakes if it happens, there's nothing you can do about it. And the best thing you can do is to fix it the best way that you can or if you can't, then you should just accept it, move on and try to find new things na mas okay para sayo [that would be much better for you.]

Moving Forward

Stevenson Que: What's Next for Caren V?

Caren V: Since my degree is in Legal Management, there's no way to go but Law School.

"I just wish that I can be successful fast enough
to give back to them" - Caren V

Stevenson Que: Ilang years pa ba after? [How many more years after?]

Caren V: Four years plus Bar, one year.

Stevenson Que: Where do you see yourself 10 years after?

Caren V: Working, of course. Mostly giving back to my parents. I'm thinking of fixing the house, buying furniture for it. It's one thing I always pray for, knowing that by the time that they are going to be old, after I graduate, after bar, I just wish that I can be successful fast enough to give back to them.

Both: Awwwwww

Stevenson Que: Yah, They'll be 70 in 10 years!

Caren V: Just as I've said, I want it fast enough, para makapagbigay pabalik kasi baka super tanda na nila [to give back because they'll be very old that time]

Stevenson Que: Kaya mo yon, ikaw pa! [You can do it, that's for sure!]

Caren Que V

Stevenson Que: Graduation is upcoming, how do you feel right now?

Caren V: Super. I can't explain. Especially during the Baccalaureate Mass, they said that's definitely one of the highlights because you get to sing the Alma Mater Hymn, Fireworks, and there's a lot of symbolism, they gave us a Dominican Cross which is a symbol of the cross and the light, guidance, It was very nice. It's been very fast, considering three years ago, I was on a different course. I was doing a very different thing like plates, art, but after that it turned to readings and recitations - it was all very fast!

And now I'm graduating, I realize that I did Legal Management for just three years. I had 14 back subjects when I shifted, as in 14 back subjects from first year that I needed to make up to, which I did by overloading schedules and summer terms every year.

Stevenson Que: I can even remember you telling me that you were pleading with the registrar to permit your overloads.

Caren V: Yes! Because one is not allowed to do overloading unless you are in your Senior Year. But since I was explaining that I have so many subjects to make up to for me to graduate on time...

Stevenson Que: *interrupts* So you mean since your second year, you are already overloading subjects?

Caren V: Yes and ayun, nakaraos naman [there, I made it through]

Stevenson Que: So that's all! Thank you so much and Congratulations! You know that I've always been proud. Two weeks left and I'm excited on what's next beyond graduation, but saka na muna yon [let's not think about that for the moment], let's first celebrate for now! Again Thank You Caren.

***

PROFILES is a new segment on my blog which will be a one-on-one interview with an interesting personality, as I ask them to share a page of their life as they know it. I've always wanted to be a journalist so this is my way of feeding my hunger for that little taste of being a host. Through this blog, this world that I can call my own, this is my talk-show.

For My Mom

Ghing is the strongest woman I know. Her positivity empowers her to do anything even the unthinkable. Her influence is just simply remarkable. Friends just indulge in her presence for she is a source of inspiration and hope. She lived a wonderful life, fought a lot of battles. Her life is a true testament of endurance and compassion. In her absence, life was never the same. 

Here's a little story about me and my mom and the lessons I have learned through her life and beyond it. We had a lot of disagreements. There were even times that I feel like she hated me. I always wanted to be the apple of her eye, because having her favor will be my greatest advantage. But when she left, I realise how much love she has for me, how she was always there for me. That the day she was born was the biggest blessing that the Lord has ever given me, long before I was even thought of. How she has always believed in all my dreams and ambitions, no matter how I change them on instants. To believe in myself, no matter what I want to do or who I want to be, is of utmost importance to her.

She prepared me well before she passed. In her vulnerable state I was trembling deep inside but I refuse to give in to the thought of losing her. For I know she wanted our family to be strong as her, that even to her last good-bye, she wants us to celebrate her beautiful life. I even went to work that very day after all that happened because I know that's what she wants. She polished everything before it was her time to go back to her real home in heaven, and for that, she showed how her love strands even beyond her living days.

The love she emits to her family extends to all of her friends. I think that is something I got from her - a heart exuding with love and care and concern despite the disparities. She is someone who gives her all and invests her cares, which also spells out her sorrow whenever she feels that a friend is drifting away from her presence. I got that from her, and I am thankful for it.

It's been six years since she finished fighting her battles, but honestly, I can still feel that she is with me. Cliche as it sounds but 'they never go away for they live in our hearts forever' is true. Saying goodbye doesn't lead to forgetting them - it's on us to let them live within ourselves and that's what makes a person eternal. That's what makes a person live beyond a life they have lived, with that, my mom lives on. On every adventure I embark on, every laughing moment, and even at times when I just cry and release my sadness - She is there.

To my Mom, thank you for the things you have taught me. They may not be the typical moments between a mother and a son but I apologize that it took me to loose you before I realize all of them. For teaching me how to love and how to value friends, which led to be one of my prized virtues in life, I thank you. To give up on a person no matter what, but also letting go, though may be hard, of people who gives up on you. Most of all, thank you for loving me in your own special way. Your imperfections make you the perfect mother for the son that I was and the person that I am today. We shared a special bond that only us can understand and learn from. I promise to live a life that will make you proud - it won't be that hard because all you want for me is to live a happy life, be a blessing to others, and to be a good person inside and out.

To my Mommy, and to all the Mothers in the World, HAPPY MOTHER'S DAY!

+Trinidad Masdal Que

02.09.58 - 01.11.11

Josefina "Neneng" Que Lozares (1947 - 2017)

Josefina "Neneng" Que Lozares 

(January 14, 1947 -  February 18, 2017)

Your advices are always up to date and not the traditional advices from old people. You always see to it that whoever needs your words will feel understood and accepted and loved.

It was so hard to see you leave especially for me who's used to seeing you every single day since I was born. But you're at the best place now with all our loved ones including my Mom and Lolo and Lola and Uncle Gody.

I love you Auntie Neneng, Thank you for everything!

Here are some beautiful and timeless photographs of my Aunt Neneng during her years:

Josefina during her teenage years

Josefina during her teenage years

My Beautiful Auntie Neneng at New General Lumber who she is one of the founding pillars

College Days

Walking out of her Bridal Car (August 10, 1968)

Josefina and Vivencio on their Wedding Day (August 10, 1968)

Auntie Neneng with her Niece

Left to Right: Nana Norie, Auntie Neneng, Kuya Venice, Kuya Tom, Lola Bebang

Front: Kuya Jon-Jon

Uncle Bay and Auntie Neneng

Auntie Neneng on a Birthday Party at Westin Philippine Plaza

Auntie Neneng at the Grand Palace, Thailand (June 2015)

Auntie Neneng at Bangkok, Thailand (June 2015)

"We love you so much Auntie and you'll always be part of us even if you are now in Heaven"

+ Josefina "Neneng" Que Lozares 

(January 14, 1947 -  February 18, 2017)